Gang of New York

In Jerry Manuel's first night on the job, Jose Reyes suffered from tightness in his hamstring. Manuel, like any responsible manager, advised Reyes to leave the game. Jose did not agree with this, and threw a little helmet flinging temper tantrum. Jerry Manuel responded in the most professional of manners. A death threat.

As told to the Daily News by Manuel, "I told him the next time he does that I'm going to get my blade out and cut him. I'm a gangster. You go gangster on me, I'm going to have to get you. You do that again, I'm going to cut you right on the field."

Wow. This is really a B-E-A-utiful start to the newest era of failure in Queens. In tribute to Jerry's eloquent words, I present to you, "Cut You Up with A Linoleum Knife" by Mastodon. Sure the fact that this video refers to the rules of a movie theater might seem out of place, but I think the dancing snacks make about as much sense as this year's team, and are twice as fun to watch.